Mourning the death of a loved one takes on a life of its own. Getting past it can be stressful, as memories flood reality, causing anger, bargaining, denial and acceptance — not necessarily in that order, and the cycle repeats over and again.

Upon reaching a certain age most have attended a funeral or two. Sadness prevails in spite of the loss resulting from a lesser or greater evil. But the “who” does matter.

And so it goes — I went through my wife’s clothes, shoes, costume jewelry, papers, dolls, books, everything. Searching through her clothing pockets and the bounty of purses to find caked inside corners filled with cotton, sticky copper pennies, spent chewing gum wrappers, and even S&H Green stamps! The process generated a deep grief but also ensured the healing would set in. Visits to a grieve counselor has been most helpful.

Crying with loved ones, mutual and solo friends of hers; making funeral arrangements, obtaining and faxing the death certificate, dealing with her creditors.

I believe the “who” matters. While over the years I lost my mom to an aneurysm, a brother to tobacco-related disease, and a sister to stroke, losing a spouse is the most grief I’ve ever experienced. But I want to write here about the common links to each of their deaths. Black Americans are in a category of what is called high risk and die disproportionately from preventable diseases.

According to a study conducted by the Institutes for Health Information in Canada, women who are older (50+ years old) and African American, suffer from Chronic Kidney Disease (CKD) more then any other group of women. The study underlines black women as a high risk to kidney failure, and ultimately candidates for dialysis, and kidney transplant. I‚ve studied this topic and agree that high blood pressure, lifestyle, and societal stressors contribute to disparities more then other factors.

And when it comes to this health index, race does matter.

A report conducted by the U.S. National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases (NIDDK) indicates that diabetes and high blood pressure are the leading causes of kidney failure. They account for 44 percent and 28 percent of all new cases, respectively. While rates for diabetes-related new cases of kidney failure among whites under age 40 were at the lowest since the late 1980s, there’s been no change among blacks in the same age group.

A movement is afoot in America to reach Black women and other underserved groups to raise the level of awareness, and to encourage regular visits to the doctor‚s office to detect early signs of kidney failure, high blood pressure, and diabetes.

The African American Health Coalition, a local organization, works with underserved groups, and all in need of information and treatment for preventable disease. The AAHC runs a fitness program specifically tailored for underserved, high risk groups. The goal to educate about how diet and exercise are linked to good health and can reduce risk factors to diabetes, hypertension, high blood pressure, and kidney failure is catching on. Researchers in the field are cautiously optimistic that rates are beginning to stabilize. Things to do include:

Control of blood pressure and diabetes through regular doctors visits

• Monitor sugar and salt intake

• Join a health club

• Form or join a support group (AAHC — 503-413-1850)

• Sign up with a donor program (Oregon Donor Program - (503) 494-7888)

Ms. Rashad’s health was compromised by low functioning kidneys due to high blood pressure. A condition she was diagnosed for during her teen years but neglected to take seriously until the condition worsened in the early forties. It was last year when she begin to experience symptoms related to kidney failure which led to regular visits to a dialysis center three times a week, four hours per session. This took a lot out of her. There where many sleepless nights, sick nights.
She strived to educate her self about diet and exercise, but associated health factors became overwhelming. She died from a hemorrhagic stroke as a consequence of hypertension.

This story is told too often about high risk groups. The hope is sharing it again will encourage someone to live a fuller, healthier life informed by education and prevention

Life connects us with death, and connects back to life. Every living thing will go through this cycle.

Human endeavor brings us face to face with the truth of our own mortality. We will die one day — guaranteed. While alive we do all we can to experience joy, health, and love.

Rashad’s writings deal with culture, aesthetics and spirituality. His topics, opinions and insights pay homage to the scholarly search for truth, which leads to personal responsibility and the preservation of community life.